A participant weeps during the candlelight vigil on Thursday.

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Relatives of Dwight Waldrop, who brutally murdered his wife Adeina Alleyne before killing himself on Tuesday, say they had advised Alleyne many times to leave the toxic relationship, but she refused.

Speaking at a candlelight vigil held in her memory at the Bronx in Embacadere, San Fernando, on Thursday night, a relative who identified herself as Kadijah said they often saw the horrific treatment that Alleyne faced at the hands of Waldrop, also known as Quan.

“As many of you all know, the families meshed and a lot of us would not have communicated with Quan because of the way he treated her. We didn’t stand up for it and we didn’t accept it. We tried and we asked Deina to please leave but Deina alone saw the good in Quan.”

She also extended an apology to Alleyne’s family.

“On behalf of our family, we would like to say sorry to Deina’s family for this tragedy,” she wept.

She urged men to be stronger for women and to stop abusing them.

Tammy Sandy, a community activist, said Alleyne was the fifth woman to be murdered in T&T for this year.

“Violence against all women must stop. Many women are afraid to reach out for fear of judgment, weakness and shame. We need our community to be an environment where our women can feel safe in their homes,” Sandy said.

She added, “This situation makes us feel as if we failed Adeina. She didn’t deserve this. We have to be our sisters’ keepers.”

Sandy also called for help for women.

“So many people are suffering. Mental health is real. People are suffering from depression, psychosis, schizophrenia, just to name a few. People that suffer from this can be badly hurt and may require psychological help and medication,” she said.

Attorney General Faris Al-Rawi, who also attended the event, vowed to assist the couple’s three orphaned children and their grandmother, who will now have the task of caring for them even though she is now in her 80s.

“All of us who come from here know this tragedy, had a story before it and we all knew there were warning signs. Tonight, I want to say very simply, we have to say something when we see something,” Al-Rawi said.

He also had a message for the men in the community.

“I’d like to say to the young men, older men, uncles and aunts, we have to have a serious conversation with the men. There is no exception to respect, no exception to loving our women, our sisters, mothers, daughters, nieces and we have to call the young men and older men aside and let them know that if we see them going astray, our community needs to step in.”

Acknowledging the pain being faced by both sides of the family, Al-Rawi said, “Sometimes a brother needs to step in and talk to him and help him to climb down from that high and know there is a better way.”

He also said the couple’s children, now left traumatised from witnessing the murder, must be given help.

“As our community and country mourn, as the MP I can tell you every resource possible will be given to ensure that these three beautiful children and their grandmother, who is in her eighties, will get help. It takes a community to pitch in and help,” he said.

Meanwhile, Gregory Laing, the owner of Puff and Stuff Bakery where Alleyne worked as a supervisor, described her as an exemplary worker. He said she was always willing to come in early when called.

“She was diligent and hardworking, an exemplar worker,” Laing said.

He added that he has hired many people from the Embaccadere area who displayed Alleyne’s qualities of diligence.

Alleyne, 35, was stabbed to death around 7 pm on Tuesday by her husband Dwight Waldrop, a security officer. Their relationship was described as tumultuous and even though she left Waldrop many times, she always returned to him. Waldrop committed suicide in an adjoining room after the brutal attack.